Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Sex, Lies and School Boards?

It is fair to say that I lead a public life.  Also fair to say is that I wear my heart on my sleeve.  So when something effects me or my brood, I have been known to impulsively take my grievances to social media, the blogosphere and even traditional media.  I also write books, record songs and create videos as expressions of my angst. 

So when we my family moved back to Iowa in 2010 and immediately began notice a mismanaged and deteriorating school system, I began airing my grievances to whomever would listen in my personal circle.  Our experiences centered primarily around my teenager's experiences with the "Hail Mary Pass" that the Des Moines Public Schools (DMPS) threw when they hired a new principal for East High School.  But the real straw that Broke the Heather Ryan Back was when I enrolled my middle daughter in Kindergarten in 2012. Below is the abridged version of my personal story and the public fight that ensued.



We enrolled Ireland in our neighborhood school, Stowe Elementary, around July 18, 2012 so she could begin Kindergarten classes after the Iowa State Fair ended in late August 2012.  Imagine our surprise when administrators contacted me the following day to inform me that Ireland would not be allowed to attend classes at that school which was literally 0.75 miles (walking distance) up the street because our house had been "re-districted" by the DMPS School Board on July 17, 2012.  Ireland was now slated to attend one of the worst schools in the entire state, three miles from our home.  I was astounded when we were informed that my five year old was to board a bus each morning and afternoon so she could attend a school consisting of 700 deeply economically challenged students.  Additionally, Ireland had already MISSED the first two weeks of school!  Capital View Elementary scores SO POORLY on their standardized tests that they have become one of the only "year around" schools in the state.  When we went to the "new" school (which used to be a small neighborhood school until the DMPS Board and Superintendent Witherspoon demolished it ten years ago and replaced it with a new, consolidated mega-structure in a bizarre, arm twisting scheme for a sales tax increase and a slew of non-bid contracts), I was aghast at the Prison feel of the institution.  Literally.  It looked and felt like a prison.

Long story kind-of short, we finally sucked it up and powered through several months of Ireland's Kindergerden year.  Some of our issues with that particular school were that it is infested with head lice, which is apparently no longer considered an "illness" by DMPS, so students are not even sent home with instructions for treatment.  There is no PTSA or similar group to encourage parental involvement.  EVERY child receives free breakfast and lunch because the prevalence of poverty is so great - no state/federal qualification forms need to be filled out there - this "School in Need of Assistance" is just considered 100% free and reduced eligible.  Finally, Ireland was 1 of almost 30 kids in her class - a huge class - but that was just one of the FOUR Kindergarten classes in this gigantic consolidated school.  So when "Open Enrollment" season finally opened up, we faxed our application paperwork in on the very first day, then I mailed it.  I wanted to make sure that it was received by DMPS!  We were simply asking that our family be allowed to drive (or walk) Ireland to another neighborhood school that was more compatible with our family's needs.  Since DMPS is an "Open Enrollment System", I didn't think we were asking too much.

Then we waited. And waited.  We waited for over three months for the school district to send us a letter that stated we couldn't leave Capital View Elementary, the school that they forced my daughter into, because of our "Economic Status".  Don't ask me exactly what that's supposed to mean because in a 100% "Free and Reduced Lunch Eligible" school, it seems like everyone asking to leave the school would be denied for the same reason.  Also, don't ask the School Board what that means because they will direct you to seek answers from their attorney.  I know because that's what they did to parents questioning these (300) letters at the very next school board meeting, which I attended.


This school board has been vexed with scandals, bad leadership, and a members who treat parents with disdain for years.  But it wasn't until I personally started to experience their gross negligence that I really started to pay attention to the severe mismanagement of our schools by just a handful of self-proclaimed elitists.  I continued to pay attention to their website and the news stories swirling around their latest scandals and lawsuits over the months that followed my family's encounter with the backwards system.  The DMPS website stated that they would post information about the School Board Election "Mid 2013" and I was interested to see who I could throw my support behind once the process and candidates were announced.  When I e-mailed the board on Sunday June 9, 2013 to ask when they would be updating the site with information about the election process (an election that was just 3 months away at that point), I received four separate e-mails back from board members and their hired mouthpiece.  The responses ranged from unhelpful to insulting.  It was absolutely unbelievable that the folks who are ultimately responsible for teaching our children would send correspondence filled with misspellings, misinformation and antagonism in response to my simple, three sentence inquiry.  That's when I decided it was time for me to do my part to "Bounce the Board".   I started a Facebook Page, created a Twitter account and gave interviews to the local media.

As stated above, this School Board has been plagued with drama, scandal and lawsuits for many, many years.  The three members who seem to hold the rest of the board by the short hairs are Boesen, Caldwell-Johnson and Murphy and they are ALL up for re-election in September.  Additionally, they are all the nitwits who shot back bizarre responses to my simple inquiry in early June.  Surely, it's not too much to ask to replace (at least) three of the four current members who are seeking re-election, Right?

Well, easier said than done, I'm sure.  This campaign will surely take more than just a Facebook presence and Twitter account.  These members have a collective tenure of 30ish years on the School Board, tons of name recognition and most importantly, MONEY.  But I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this movement gains momentum and the oodles of folks who have contacted me regarding their similarly poor experiences are proactive and aggressive in the effort to Bounce the Board in the September 10, 2013 elections.  Des Moines deserves a school board that is more dedicated to student excellence than their own inflated egos.

So PLEASE, click these hyperlinks to join the Facebook Page and Twitter Account.  Share this blog, share your story (comment on this blog or Facebook) and help spread the word!  The only way this will be successful is if we have strong candidates willing to stand up for the students during this desperately important election and dedicated activists who help spread the word and get out to vote on the weird, obscure election date of Tuesday, September 10, 2013!

Please help me, Bounce the Board!          
 
Until Next Time,

Heather Ryan
@LoudAndLiberal

** IMPORTANT NOTE ** 
My Hyperlinks ROCK!
As is always the case in my blog posts, the hyperlinks in my text add to the story and are often fantastic little gems that will make you laugh (or at least inform)!  Be sure to follow my hyperlinks for added information and occasional fun!

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Congressman Braley's Got NOTHIN' on Me!

It was a big week for the folks over at The Great March for Climate Action.  They received their very first Congressional back slap in the form of an endorsement from Iowa's popular Congressman Bruce Braley.  Bruce is a super cool progressive who is running for the U.S. Senate next year in an effort to replace the Amazing Tom Harkin.

Yeah, sure, kudos on that one - Bruce is one rockin' dude.  BUT, the real exciting news - the news that I held off on telling anyone for several days, is that I OFFICIALLY became the Director of Communications for the Great March for Climate Action!  That's right, I am hanging up my hat as the "Ultimate Talent Mentor"; which means that my work with crazy assed pageant moms has come to an abrupt and welcome END!  If you haven't seen any of the press on this particular topic, you can find some of the more entertaining articles here: Perez Hilton, Radar Online, Reuters, The Hollywood Gossip

So see, it was super cool that Bruce Braley came on board, but come on now, how can he compete with the tabloid fodder I so freely perpetuate?  Hence, Bruce Braley's Got Nothin' on ME! 

Now, as you can imagine, since I am now the Communications Director for the Great March for Climate Action, I'll be talking a great deal more about global warming in this blog and ASKING YOU FOR DONATIONS (I'm not kidding, that hyperlink makes it easy for you to give to this important cause!).

BUT, please don't mistake this blog as an extension of the March.  This is my personal Political Blog and I plan to continue with my unique brand of insight into all things worthy!  As in - Did you Hear that Heather French-Henry (former Miss America) is contemplating a run against Bitch McConnell?  Yeah, we'll discuss that new development in the next blog!

Until next time, Please be sure to Go Like The Great March for Climate Action's Facebook Page

Heather Ryan
Formerly, The Ultimate Talent Mentor
Currently, The Ultimate Climate Rockstar!

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Sioux City Officially Changes name to "Hell"

I knew the time would come!  The illustrious Sioux City, Iowa has officially changed their name to "Hell" and the ever-disgusting, Representative Steve King (R-IA) is to blame. 

The Climate Gods smited the area yesterday with an ASTOUNDING 106 Degree Day!  Yes, you read right, the temperature was over 100* on May 14, 2013 - something that has NEVER happened in recorded history.  Never, not once, ever.  Lest we forget, it was only two weeks ago when it was SNOWING - at the beginning of May - and we were all scratching our heads saying, "SNOW?  IN MAY?! WTH?!"

Now, we know that the cause for these insane weather swings is because Congressman Steve King, AKA, the Devil, claims this area as his backyard.  It doesn't take a climate scientist to figure out that temperatures of 106 in May are completely because Satan claims the Midwest as a vacation spot.  I mean, what else could it be?  Surely, it could NOT be something called, "Global Climate Change", as preached by those nut jobs with The Great March for Climate Action?  If that were so, nitwits like King (R-IA) would be forced to admit that spewing CO2 into the environment is a BAD THING?

Well, we know that admission from the climate-change-deniers is NEVER going to happen - so I conclude - STEVE KING IS TO BLAME FOR THE HOT WEATHER IN IOWA. 

There is a lot to talk about over the next several weeks, so stay tuned!

 Until Next Time,

Heather Ryan
@LoudAndLiberal

Monday, May 6, 2013

Senator Harkin and Ed Fallon - Which is The Bigger Loony Bird?


It's been far too long since last I blogged to "Heather's Crap on a Cracker".  For the past many months, my blogging life has circled around my other blog, "The Ultimate Talent Mentor", so if you are absolutely starved for my words of wisdom, by all means, be sure to check out that blog as well.

Though my other works are truly brilliant (cough, cough), my negligence of this blog is simply inexcusable because there is just so much to discuss in all things political!  Among about a zillion other issues, my personal hero, Tom Harkin (D, IA) is calling it quits next year, which means there will be a lively and oh-so-important Senate run in Iowa revving up in just a few months.  Until just a few days ago, I was absolutely convinced that the devil himself, Steve King (R. IA) would abandon his Congressional Seat to make a bid for the open Senate Seat with a run against Bruce Braley.  Well, that would have made for a fun time, watching King have his ass handed to him by Braley.  As it is though, some dufus named Matt Whitaker is currently the only one to announce his intentions.  The race should heat up as more Repugs dip their club feet into the pool to test out the water, which is precisely why I am taking up the gauntlet on this blog, once again. 

Additionally, one of my good Lefty Loony Liberal Friends, Ed Fallon, has decided to engage in an ambitious campaign that he is calling "The Great March for Climate Action" where he aims to host ONE THOUSAND concerned citizens in a walk across the country to raise awareness of the extremely troubling problem of Climate Change.  THE.  ENTIRE.  COUNTRY.  Seriously.  From Los Angeles to Washington, DC, starting in March 2014 and ending around election day.  I'm debating whether Ed is the craziest man I have ever encountered, OR, perhaps he is the most brilliant strategist in the history of Iowa politics.  Whichever the case may be, I want to be sure to follow the saga and blog along as the story develops.


So, join me with my re-discovered obsession of all things politics.  Your efforts will be rewarded with tons of fun and entertaining political banter - from your favorite lefty smart ass!

Until we meet again, be sure to "Like" the Facebook Page for the Climate March and "Follow" their Twitter Page.  Both of these hyperlinks will take you to the appropriate places to accommodate those needs!     

Heather Ryan
Loud And Liberal